Just a few months back, I had literally no answer to the question: what is the most scared you have ever been? Fast forward to after NYSC camp. I would now consider the thump thump of my heart as I lay under the bed staring at the soldiers boot so close to my nose as he searched for those hiding away from the daily parade. I didn’t realize I was even holding my breath till he walked out of the room.
I would also consider the day I mistook a soldier for one of the people charging phones and told him to “use original charger ooo”. But in all honesty, the fear on those days probably do not measure up to what I was feeling in this picture.
Maybe I look stable, maybe I don’t, but what you need to know is that I was about 12 ft in the air with only these two ropes to support me. I was moving when I first got on the ropes but for some reason, I suddenly froze.
I tried to move but I could see myself tumbling to the ground. My hands started sweating and got really slippery. My legs started getting weak. And the rhythm of my heart pounding never seemed to stopp. In fact it seemed to be saying “Tomi, this is the end”. My eyes started to turn and I stopped feeling my legs. I just wanted to shout “Tell my mummy I love her”…
I was stuck in this position for almost five minutes and people were waiting to climb but I just couldn’t move. Some of the man o’ war guys then came around. I guess I hoped they would just help me to get down and that would be the end of my ordeal but I didn’t believe what the guy said to me.
He looked up at me and said “You can’t get down. You have to keep moving.” I’m like “huh? ”
He explained that trying to get me down would offset my balance in some way and I would tumble to the ground before anyone could catch me so I actually had to finish the course and get to the ladder.
I started to cry. Not serious tears but I could feel a flood more burning behind my eyes.
I finally opened my eyes and did what I had to do. I still don’t exactly remember what I did differently other than to move. I went slower than I started but I moved. And it turns out that was all I had to do to get to the end and come down the ladder.
It was crazy scary experience but it was also one of the greatest life lessons I learnt. You need to keep moving no matter what and no matter how slow. What matters is that you’re not frozen or stagnant. Just keep moving!
Much love 😍
Your tiny eyed storyteller.
Of course, it is only wise to look for strength in the strong and what better strength than the Lion of the Tribe of Judah Himself (whoop!) But a lot of us ‘lift up our eyes to the hills’ more by mouth than by heart.
We’re quick to worry and panic when things don’t go as they ought to (this is so me 🙈🙈) and when help eventually comes we’re even quicker to attach it to some reason or coincidence instead of the One our help truly comes from. So even when we say we are looking up to the hills, we never really take our eyes off from the earth.
In doing this, we miss out on the glory of looking up to the hills. We hinder growth in our lives. The thing is, we grow in the direction we constantly face like plants for instance. And so it’s hard for upwards growth to occur if we are constantly looking down.
So hey, look up. Look to the hills. Look to God. Help will come and when it does come, be quick to acknowledge that it is indeed God. If I’ve learnt anything, it’s that we have no power of our own. I’m picking up on my look up game today, no more by mouth😄. You should too. ,
Your tiny eyed storyteller.
Yes…God is most glorified in us when we are most satisfied in Him. All those times when you feel like He isn’t listening or He doesn’t understand, He is there watching you and saying “Sweetie, I created you. No one can understand you like I do”. Of course no one can, or do you understand a product better than its manufacturer?
Sadly enough, we forget this so many times and we forget the beautiful feeling of relief, peace and satisfaction we get when we leave it all to God to lead, to direct us.
I remember the story of some men lost in a forest. They had a compass with them to direct them but after they had followed it for a while, the road began to look different and unfamiliar. They were soon convinced that the compass was broken and so they couldn’t depend on it for directions. They began to find their way out themselves. As expected, they ended up getting even more confused. In the end, they resorted to the supposed broken compass and that is what led them out of the forest safely.
Many times, we feel like God is not doing it right. Like there is a better way or an easier way simply because the road looks rough or unfamiliar. Well God has a compass I’m super sure it isn’t broken. He knows exactly where and how to lead you so all you have to do is trust Him and not depend on your own abilities.
The story of David and Goliath again brings to mind one thing – Trust!!!`The Israelites always found it very hard to just trust God and so when they saw Goliath, they were only thinking about the Big Philistines, forgetting about the Big God. Then young David came, trusting the Big God all the way and with a single stone and a sling, down went Goliath. No one takes down a giant with a single stone but David was so confident. He knew it was God leading him and even though it seemed really stupid, he took the risk.
We may feel that God’s plan for us is really stupid sometimes but we have to simply trust and obey; bearing in mind that God’s compass is not broken!!!
Keep trusting God.
Your tiny eyed story teller.
Going to quickly write this before I change my mind. It’s my first post back to the blog in over a month. The break was really sudden, even to me and I’ll tell y’all about it today.
I was going to post my 20 before 20 post about 4 weeks ago. It took me a lot of time writing it and putting my thoughts together. When I was done, I was really excited about it. I added my images and it remained just one image. I saved the post and decided I would add the image later at night and then post.
Fast forward to night, time to post. I opened my app and the whole post was gone. Disappeared. I couldn’t believe my eyes. I searched and searched but I couldn’t find it. I couldn’t sleep that night. I spent the whole night using Google to try to find a solution or a way for me to recover the post but I couldn’t. It was really gone. Somehow I kept hoping that it would miraculously come back (the way we all do when something we value gets missing or spoilt).
The next morning, I spent the whole day at the office cranky and still trying to find my post. Same thing the next day and same thing till the end of the week. It was weekend before I finally accepted that the post was gone and gone for good. I think I cried a little. One might say “Are you not the one that wrote it? Just write it again na” but it really doesn’t work like that. Or maybe it does for some people but not me. So I couldn’t “just write it again”. I wanted my post back.
For some reason after this acceptance that my post was gone, I didn’t post anything else on the blog. Or maybe I just couldn’t. I think I was mourning my lost post😂
Or I was probably just upset and taking it out on my blog. Either ways, I was being silly letting some situation get the better of me. I let that little obstacle hold me back for weeks. I haven’t exactly had any major challenge blogging so this was a first and I don’t think I handled it properly. However, I’m learning that challenges are not to destroy you. They’re to stretch, strengthen and make you a better person. But these things can’t happen if you don’t get past the challenge and you let it hold you back.
So now? Against all odds (or one odd) I’m done and I’m back 😉 but most importantly, I’m grateful. I’m grateful because this period has helped me to reflect and learn a lot of things on my own, some of which I would share:
1. You need to keep your focus on the outcome and not on the obstacle .
2. Nothing will work unless you do the work.
3. Every experience brings along with it new courage and strength to carry on. It’s up to you to tap into it.
4. When you face hindrances, you don’t change your goal. You change your technique of getting there.
5. You’re the only one that can stop yourself. Believe in yourself and put in the work and watch yourself become unstoppable.
So that is it guys. Tinyeyed is back! Thanks for sticking with me. 20 before 20 post may or may not be coming but expect other posts definitely. Happy new month love.
Much love 😍
Your tiny eyed storyteller